Category Archives: Miscellaneous

Can Positive Thinking Change Your Life?

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Most people nowadays are always in a depressed state of mind due to the pressures of life. Doctors and counselors constantly advices you to thinking think positively in order to set back depression. However, it is tougher to do than to say. Studies show that people who accept defeat sportingly are the happier strata of people and they have an optimistic attitude towards life.

It often may happen that you get worried out of minor issues arising in your daily life. On the other hand, do you get frustrated when things go haphazard? Do you think that you are not happy as much as others are? Do you get angry at the slightest mistake? If these entire attitudes have covered your life, then learn some positive thinking strategies to make life easier and happier. Only an optimistic person can lead a happy and peaceful life.

Now you may ask what exactly the meaning of positive thinking is and how important it is. The answer to this is positive thinking is a process of thinking everything in life or surroundings from a positive or brighter side even if it reflects a negative tone. The outlook and approach towards a task should be from a positive point. The thought in your head must enlighten the positive aspects instead of the negative, discouraging thoughts. Once you change your attitude from a pessimist to an optimist, you will find feel all the good vibes. All good things will surround you and give you more energy to move forward in times of depression.

Nevertheless, how do you suddenly change from being a pessimist to an optimist? Well, it is not a matter of sudden change or changing your thinking process within a day. It all depends on time, your practice and willingness. You have to learn to identify your inner voice. This is the first step to make the changes.

Some people perform an act suddenly without thinking for a second time. They do not think from their whether they really want to do or not. Therefore, first you have to learn to identify your inner voice. After that, always speak in a positive manner. For instance, if you are asking yourself a question, then instead of asking, “Am I not capable of doing this work?” ask, “Am I capable of doing this work?” It reflects a positive attitude. You can find several such examples in your daily life if you put a little attention to what you do.

Therefore, if you are willing to change your life for the good, then keep a little patience and learn to think positively.

Self-Acceptance Is the Key to Life Transformation

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Sometimes, in the course of our lives, we find ourselves saying yes to things, which create tension in us. As we think of them, or about them, we wonder why we keep allowing ourselves to make the same bad decisions. Dwelling on the decisions we make can create a cycle of negative thinking and resisting the urge to say no can just keep adding to the tension we are experiencing.

The desire to be successful is important to most of us. We want to be the best husband, or provider for our family, or the best at our job. We want to make the best cakes or be the best mother or wife. Our self-esteem is often dependent on how we think others think about us. Our struggle to achieve great things in our life is often the result of a desire to feel accepted by others as a means of feeling self accepted.

Even the most self confident of people have their insecurities about themselves. People with famous faces often resort to face lifts and heavy use of make-up to protect their public image. Being insecure is not a failing, but part of our humanity. When those insecurities begin to drive our decisions and our choices, then we risk making poor decisions and creating inner tension and negative self-talk.

To help develop a strong sense of self-acceptance, it is important to ask ourselves about the intentions we have in making our decisions and what our motivations are in accepting it. Sometimes the good decisions we make, aren’t the best decisions. Instead, they reinforce the cycle of trying to find self-acceptance by first experiencing the acceptance of others.

Taking an inventory of our own dreams and strengths is essential to breaking this cycle. Our value and worth isn’t dependent on who others think we are, but in what we think of ourselves. As we get in touch with, and enjoy the person we are, we are able to make life decisions that contribute to and enhance our self-image and in the process, we find others accept us.

The cycle is reversed when this happens. When we accept ourselves, we begin to learn how to be self confident and generous in our acceptance of others. We find ourselves being naturally accepted by others for who we are and not for what we do.

Self esteem improvement; Start now before it is too late

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Be determined to improve your self esteem and you are on your way to great achievement.

Do not let a low self esteem ruin your life. The way you think about yourself determines how you interact with others.

What are some examples of low esteem aspects in you mind that you need improvement on?

1. Nothing you do seems to go right
2. You believe that most people do not like you.
3. You believe that you are not attractive.
4. You choose something and it turns out to be the worst one.
5. You are afraid to converse with others for fear that what you say might not make sense.
6. You feel swallowed up in a whirlpool of frustration.
What’s wrong with you? Your thoughts, actually.

Stop thinking that the world is closing in on you. Get determined to achieve what you desire. Stop blaming other people for your misfortunes. The world is not your problem, you are your own problem.

From this moment on, begin the process of self esteem improvement. Think the right way and be determined to win, and win you will. Just remember that success never comes easily and that is why determination is its counterpart.

Oftentimes, one gets to the brink of success and with just a little disappointment or setback, they lose heart and give up too easily and too soon. A surefire candidate to low self esteem improvement. Who knows what great things might have been achieved if only they had persevered.

Without a high self esteem, your life could be rather boring. Change your thinking and begin to see yourself on top of the world. Make a very special effort to be what you really want to be.

You have to seriously decide either to remain in a miserable state of low self esteem, or acquire self esteem improvement and develop a high self esteem with good character and self image.
The origin of low self esteem.

A low self esteem could begin way back in childhood when children are made to believe that they are worthless. Their self confidence is eroded and they succumb to the idea that they can never achieve success in anything that they do. They were picked on, laughed at, pushed around, called ugly names, and treated with disdain. No wonder they grew up to be full of resentment.

If that was your experience, it is time you cut yourself loose from that mindset and do self esteem improvement. Start reading about the life of successful persons and you will soon discover that many of them had such low self esteem that they could not even complete an elementary education.

Many decided to override their low self esteem and improve their attitude, whatever it took. They became some of the greatest men and women that ever lived.

Low self esteem has never helped anyone else and it sure will not help you. It can only drive you into depression, anger, grudge, fear and all the other evils that it generates.

Re-program your thinking and control your state of mind. You must believe that you are worth much more than you think or you will remain at the foot of the ladder and never make an attempt to climb it.

Do not waste your life away with feelings of inadequacies. Instead, think of ways to go about self esteem improvement. Success is yours, just reach out and grasp it.

Your Life Is What You Make Of It

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This article describes how your life is what you make of it. If you are willing to work hard to reach your ambitions and goals, there is no reason why should not attain them. In my opinion far too many people try to take short cuts or are too willing to expect free hand outs from other people or have the credit card attitude of buy now, pay later. I hope you enjoy the read.

One of my best friends whose name is Chris turned seventeen around a month before I did. For his birthday his father bought him a very nice and sporty looking car. Chris was very pleased and showed his new present to all his mates including myself. He was unable to take us out for a spin as he had yet to learn to drive. I thought what a great gift it had been and returned home to tell my parents.

I now had it in my head, that I also wanted a car for my birthday. Chris only lived a few doors away from my house and my parents looked out of the window to view his new car. I stated to them that I would love a car for my seventeenth and my parents started to laugh and replied with, I bet you would.

Despite this negative comment, I really believed they were only joking and was convinced that they would not let me down. My birthday arrived and I opened all of their gifts. The main present they had bought me was a pair of trainers. I have to admit they were a quality pair of trainers, however I wondered where they had hidden the car. The car was not hidden, it had not been bought.

An ungrateful young man went to bed, not best pleased. I then started to take driving lessons and on the second attempt managed to pass the driving test. I came home to inform my parents of the good news. My dad congratulated me and seemed proud of my achievement. I stated that I was also very happy, however in reality, what was the point if I had no car to drive. My father did not reply to this comment.

A couple of months later my eighteenth birthday was now approaching. My father told me that because this was quite a big birthday, he was planning to spend a bit more money on my presents this year. He asked me if I had any idea of what I would like. For the second year in a row, I replied that I would love a car. Yet again he laughed and stated that he had said a bit more, not hundreds.

I really believed that because it was in his words, a big birthday, and because I was now legally able to drive, that he would buy me a car. Guess what, he didn't. Yet again I was not impressed.

I waited a couple of months and then tried the head on approach. I spoke to my parents and told them that I needed a car, they agreed. My dad stated that if I wanted a car, I should go and buy one. I replied that I had no money, and he stated that I should start to save up then.

I started to save and had to sacrifice many things. Eventually I bought a car. It was not exactly sporty but it was my pride and joy. I washed the car every weekend and am sure that I loved it ten times more than Chris loved his car, because I had earned it.

Whenever I want to achieve something in life, I am aware that I have to work very hard and am very grateful to the lesson my parents taught me, even though at the time it seemed harsh and cruel.

 

What To Do? Life’s Big Question

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We've all experienced the same thing at important crossroads in our life when big changes were underway. Often, we find ourselves feeling panic and frozen in time, possibly with indecision, waiting and wondering: Which way to go?; How will things turn out? Sometimes, you just don't know what to do.

I'm asked frequently about this topic and oddly, I have a lot of experience with it as well. In fact, I find my life in this state of flux often as more changes loom on the horizon. Everyone, myself included, wants answers. What should I do? How do I know? These answers are never forthcoming; we cannot see into the future. Every direction can be okay; one can be the best. The simple truth is, we just don't know with 100% accuracy. This is where awareness and faith come in to play.

Awareness is important on many levels. Knowing the landscape of your life, you can make calculated decisions that support your goals. In business, and daily life activities, we implement this process automatically without much awareness at all, it has become so habitual. This, in part, is where a problem lies. Habitual behavior may not be appropriate as new data becomes available. Auto-pilot means your flying blind. Even when flying a plane on auto-pilot, the pilot will check the instrument panels to ensure the data is consistent. Why don't we? Be aware of your data.

Your data comes from many sources and most of us are familiar with these sources. I might surprise some of you with new concepts. The common source that we're all familiar with is the mind and store-house of knowledge and experience we have gained from life. Again, those who rely solely upon this source risk repeating the same mistakes over and over again. The mystery of life dictates that our ability to identify with life experience as truth results in creating more of this truth in our lives. If this truth is a truth of painful experience, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Utilizing other sources, we are able to objectively assess all sources and come to new conclusions.

The next common source is our emotions and intuition; they often are synonomous. A surprising fact here is that not everyone is in touch with their emotions or permit the emotions the freedom they deserve. Emotions are very useful in interpreting and/or being aware of underlying factors that may not be evident through hard tangible data. For some this is a gut-feeling, others have a flash of insight or conclusion, and others feel twinges in certain parts of the body without being aware of any potential significance. I have scenarios for each and will refrain from elaborating further for the sake of brevity today. Be curious to explore it further though.

A less common source for most is our spiritual awareness. This is a quiet place within that has a higher level of wisdom for the greater good. This can be pertinent to you, your life, your family life, community, work, the world, and so on. The levels of knowledge accessible here are limitless. It is as though we are connected to a universal storehouse of knowledge. This place of knowing is far less judgemental and emotional but has the ability to synthesize the data from the mind and emotions, integrating and offering solutions from a much higher level of consciousness. This is something that many people find themselves seeking as they mature and look for more significance in their lives and meaning in their work.

Finally, we must talk about the role of faith. It is the co-creative relationship and process that we have as human-beings with the source of all creation. This isn't religious, it isn't specific to any religion, yet it doesn't contradict any religion. This is born from my own quest for truth integrated with my own life and spiritual experiences. It may be incomplete and is a direction to follow, not a destination for you to reach. Such is the nature of our spiritual life; it is the journey and the ever-changing, ever-increasing level of knowledge and wisdom that we gain through life experience. With an open-mind, entertain our relationship with the source of all creation.

Creation exists, as do we. We see it all around us. Scientists study deeper into the stars. More scientists study deeper into the mysterys of time and space; quantum physics. What is witnessed is creation, its' magic and its' mystery. Down at the quantum level we discover that we're mostly made up of empty space and other unusual phenomena that cannot be explained. Out in the stars, they see an expanding universe. Now, going deeper, with probing satellites and quantum sciences, new theories arise. All seem to point to an apex of creation coming from nothing... a God Force.

Mystery is lived by people accessing this God-Force, understanding their co-creative relationship to this mystery. Understanding that this force is abundant love, it supplies us with what is in our intention. What we intend for our lives becomes real. Many people who do this consistently refer to it as manifesting. As children, many of us have had at least one solid experience of this. We may have just known that we would have something in our lives, whether a gift, an experience, a trip, whatever, and then it happens. There was no fear, doubt, uncertainty, only gladness for what was to come. That is the power of intent.

As adults, so much of our lives have instructed us to ignore so much. Don't dream to big. You can't do this. Don't do that. That's only for the privileged. You need to have a degree. There is too much competition. This is the way things work. Everywhere you turn, you are told how it is and what cannot be and you become conditioned. We have spent too little time in practice with our spiritual origins that we do not understand this mystery and in our need for control, we stifle its' requirement for room to breathe and work its' own magic. We measure things by worldly standards and time clocks, not realizing that in the bigger picture, some of those so-called failures actually were important stepping-stones in a grander scheme for our lives. Is our spiritual side still influencing the outcome? Are we making the experience harder, longer, or are we co-operating and making it easier?

 

Well Loved: How To Get Rid Of What You Don’t Want

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I'm appreciating used things. I got a great gas barbecue on Freecycle; a practically new John Deere lawnmower for $50; a beautiful Le Creuset cast iron shelf from a friend's basement, a lovely leather purse from the thrift shop. They feel like blessings. I get all the joy of something new plus an extra kick of getting it for nothing or practically so.

I'm typing this on a computer I bought used that's sitting on a desk I got at a yard sale. Come to think of it, I also inherited this chair from some previous office and I'm drinking from a water bottle I've refilled a bunch of times.

Brand new, pristine, still in the wrapper has its appeal too of course. But throwing away perfectly good stuff bugs me. I wish it were easier to get something to a good home during that whirlwind of purging that comes upon us. I use all my energy cleaning out the junk room and have nothing left for separating the things for Goodwill from the load for the dump. At that point I want the detritus gone. Now.

I see that desire to be rid of the unwanted in my clients, and in myself. We want to be different, better, changed. And we want it now. A new job, a new body, a new relationship, a new way of living. I want what I don't have, and what I have I don't want.

There is no shortage of experts to tell us how to change. As a coach I probably fall into that category. But I don't have a whizbang new approach-the Seven Steps to a whole new you. I believe you're pretty darned fabulous exactly as you are and that all meaningful transformation starts with acceptance.

Accept yourself. Recycled advice? Yes. When you're dissatisfied and stuck it can sound pretty useless. "Get me out of here!" You'd rather be any place else. But here and now is all there is. Loving and forgiving what is has got to be the first step.

Take a deep breath and bear with me for a moment here. You're changing a state of mind.

Here's how to do it:

1. Describe your current reality.

What's really true? What's not working? What is? What part do you want to make sure you keep in the future? What assumptions have you made that aren't checked out? Whose definition of valuable are you using? What are the immediate challenges and which are more long term?

2. How is this working on your behalf?

Suspend disbelief for a moment and pretend that the aspect you want to change is actually serving you in some twisted way. For example, the asshole boss is creating the impetus for you to leave a job you should have left years ago; the health emergency is a wake up call; the break up is a clear decision when you were ambivalent. Put aside the unpleasant feelings for a moment and imagine a new way of looking at the same set of circumstances-a way in which you benefit instead of being a victim.

3. Forgive.
This can be a tough one, but it's the most powerful. I've found that if I start where I am (unpleasant state-hurt, angry, etc) I can take baby steps that get me to real acceptance. Here's a possible progression:
I forgive you for being a stupid jerk.
I forgive you for saying such an insensitive thing.
I forgive you for hurting my feelings.
I forgive you for not realizing that I was expecting you.
I forgive you for not reading my mind.
I forgive myself for expecting you to.
I forgive myself for overreacting.
I forgive myself for not saying what I want.
I forgive myself for not seeing my responsibility here.

It's the acceptance, the ownership that gives you permission to let it go-whether we're talking about anger or extra weight or a snakeskin vinyl raincoat. It's not a question of judgment-keep the good and get rid of the bad. We're a spectrum-a combination of choices that sometimes looks like a masterpiece and sometimes like mud. It's not that red has no value. It just may not belong in your picture right now.

Maybe someone else can use it.

 

Ways To Improve Your Lifestyle

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Are you looking at ways to improve your lifestyle? Are you bored in your current role of employment? Do you think you could be achieving a lot more than you are at the moment? Are you seeking a new challenge? In this article, I give advice on how people can go about improving their lifestyle, this advice is based from my own personal experiences.

I believe that we should always be looking into ways of expanding our knowledge and should never just accept second best. The brain is very powerful and loves to be set a new challenge or to a learn a new task. It is what keeps it alive and ticking over. I am sure that we have all heard of the phrase, I think this job is making me brain dead. This is where someone has a role in employment that is not challenging them or their brain, and this can lead them into a state of boredom and even depression. Their mind and brains are desperate for something to get to grips with and something to test them.

I am always looking into finding new areas of life which I can learn about. Just recently I have been attempting to educate myself on the ins and outs of website promotion. This is something which is of great interest to me and I wanted to find out about how you can increase the amount of visitors you have to a website. I have spent a great deal of time studying this area and even though I feel that I have learnt a great deal, I would love to know a lot more. What I like about website promotion and website marketing is that the search engines are constantly changing their ideas of how best to rank a site, as they are fighting a constant battle against spam. This certainly keeps me on my toes. One thing I have learnt in this and other fields is that hard work pays off and if you attempt to defraud the search engines you are more than likely going to be found out. That is a good thing in my opinion.

I also like to help out people on a voluntary basis. This is something I would advise other people to do if they have the spare time as it can give you a real buzz knowing that you are helping somebody and it also keeps you busy. A lot of people who have too much time on their hands can easily find themselves becoming restless and this can lead them into thinking too much. These thoughts are normally worrying about something or other which of course is not very healthy or productive.

The people I help out on a voluntary basis are my parents who run a form of animal sanctuary from their home. My parents are both in the sixties and struggle to look after the many animals that live with them. I normally spend around twenty hours a week at their house, cleaning out and feeding the fifty rabbits, walking the dogs and feeding the cats. It is not exactly the most interesting of things to do, but I know that it is helping take some of the burden away from my mother and father.

In the past I have also attended evening study classes. This again is where I am trying to improve my knowledge and is something of course that I can include on my c.v. It is also a great way of meeting new people which is something I like to do.

In conclusion there are many ways in which we can become happier and more contented. Our life does not have to be boring and mundane, there is always options out there of how we can go about improving our lifestyle. Good luck.

 

Top Ways to Maximize Your Talents at Work

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Are you maximizing your strengths and promoting your talents at work? If you have sharp analytical skills, have you sought to apply those skills to your current job? I know it sounds crazy to ask for more work when you are already overloaded, but any assistance that you can provide now will ultimately help you advance in your present position or in a future one.

You have gifts and talents to offer the world. Your current or potential employer desperately needs to use your talents NOW, especially since they are focused on increasing revenue.

Just what ARE your talents and how can you apply them to your career?

1. Discover Your Hidden Talents

a. What are your strengths and weaknesses?

b. How can you capitalize on your strengths and improve your weaknesses?

c. Can you enhance your strengths and dissipate your weaknesses by learning on-the-job or by taking additional classes or training?

2. Promote Your Talents Within

a. Once you have an analysis of the talents you have to offer, start promoting them. If you don't tout them, then no one will.

b. Talk with your boss about helping out the team. Your pathway to the top is by being someone who can be counted on.

3. Take Action

a. After you tell your employer about your hidden talents and your ideas for using them, you must live by your words. Remember your integrity is at stake and that means something.

b. Using your talents is not a one-day project; it is a way to live and work more effectively every day. So go out there, and put your talent to work!

It may be hard to focus on your talents when the world around you is so uncertain. Put your worries behind you, and your best foot forward. You can be proud of your effort no matter what the future may bring, because you swung out and gave it your best shot.

 

To Know is To Not Know

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This is truer than people might realize. Dig deep, there is a significant powerful truth buried in this statement that can redefine life and create more positive and powerful experiences. As we navigate life, become educated in society, and learn from experiences we inevitably think we know.

We know what people are like, we know what this means and that means, we know what to expect, and we know what will be good and what will be bad. All of these perceptions are defining a reality before it even has a chance to show you something different.

To know is to not know is a statement that drops judgement and allows the experience to demonstrate something new. It also creates an openess for you to discover more; this could be more about you, more about life, more about people, or more about situations. You have still your past experiences there to offer insight and you allow the present experience to reveal more or create something new.

We often say we are not defined by our past. This is the way our life is meant to be and yet, we often are limiting our future based upon past experiences. If this is true in our lives, then we are being defined by our past. All that is needed is a shift in perspective. When the body, emotions, or mind reacts to a situation, person, or whatever, then you want to seize the moment and be curious enough to ask why you are reacting the way you are.

When you are reacting to a situation, it is fear based. This could be a belief, a family emotional trigger, a self-esteem issue, or many other root causes. Being curious and identifying this allows a couple of things to happen. Recognizing the reaction allows you to step back and inquire deeper. This will enable you to discover issues that you can then begin correcting or accepting. Second, stepping back from the reaction for reflection will allow you to respond rather than react. When you are responding to a situation, it is based in peace.

There is so much more that can be explored from this place. Personal power, personal responsibility, accepting responsibilitiy, victimization, emotions, emotional hijacking and sabotage; there are so many depths, twists, and turns along this road of spiritual awareness. Owning and understanding that aspect of your nature allows room for so much of life's experiences to occur and provide learning. Change is also easier to embrace and navigate.

To know is to not know. I'd just invite you to entertain this possibility and play with it in new situations. Whenever you find a judgement popping up, step back from it and say, "I see you, now let's just wait and see." Sometimes, the judgement may be right. Won't it be wonderful and surprising to experience new truths when the judgement is wrong?

 

There Is Always Room For Improvement

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When I was twelve my parents bought me a five foot snooker table for my birthday. This turned out to be the best present I was ever bought and I quickly became hooked on the game. My friends would regularly come round to my house for a game and when they were not there I would practice on my own.

After a few months a few of us decided to join a snooker club where we could play on full size tables. I was amazed the first time I saw one of these tables at its sheer size, it was twelve foot by six foot. We started to play and it was much more difficult to pot the balls on this much larger table.

The club itself was superb and had free coaching for children under the age of sixteen on a Saturday morning. The coach was called Glen who was aged around thirty at the time. He was a larger than life character and a very good snooker player. We were encouraged to join this free coaching which we duly did. There was regular tournaments as well as coaching and they gave us free drinks and toast.

All of the players were not exactly the best in the world being so young and not one of us had ever had a twenty break. This was the first goal of all of us, to become the first player to reach this target. I was extremely determined that it would be me and listened carefully to what I was being taught and tried hard to implement it.

My progress was quite rapid and to my amazement I was the first person to score that elusive twenty break. People around the snooker table I was playing on started to applaud and I was walking around with a beaming smile on my face.

Glen who was on the other side of the room wondered over to find out what all of the noise was about. I thought he would be so proud of me and happy at my achievement, however he stated that if I could score twenty, I could score thirty. He told me to stop messing about and smiling, and to re-concentrate on the job in hand.

I had been brought straight back down to earth and was a bit gutted to say the least. This lesson was a very good one for me to learn at such an early age and I eventually went on to have breaks of over one hundred.